Greetings, my friends. I return to my native tongue, which, as I have long maintained, is far more suited to philosophical and scientific disquisitions than the tongue of our neighbours across the Channel.

I am a great friend to innovation and invention. I regarded myself as having a ‘genius for legislation’, and the notion of ‘genius’, after all, is rooted in that of invention. For much of my life I regarded myself as a projector—an entrepreneur of ideas. Yet nothing should be taken for granted, and so I would like to take this opportunity to consider whether innovation is, in and of itself, always a good thing.

I always loved music, being an enthusiastic violinist myself, so allow me to consider the modes by which you moderns listen to music. In my day there was, of course, no such thing as sound recording—all our music was, as you misexpressively say, ‘live’. You have a whole variety of mechanisms for storing and reproducing sound, including the vinyl record—2ozs of plastic with a hole in the middle, as one very fine rock’n’roll outfit (I can use flash language as well as the next sentient creature) intituled one of their Long Playing records—the tape, the Compact Disc, and the MP3 player. The question I pose is—is the innovation represented by digital recordings an improvement over the older analogue technology represented by the vinyl record?

I understand that there are many individuals who prefer the vinyl record to the Compact Disc and the MP3 player. They claim, quite simply, that the sound emanating from a vinyl record produces a more enjoyable listening experience. I am not in a position to offer a direct personal view on this, since I do not have space in my small box for the necessary equipment to listen to a vinyl record. I must admit, however, that I can appreciate the advantages of the small size of the Walkman CD player, and, even more so, of the iPod. I wish that I had had such wonderful devices when I used to exercise in St James’ Park. Listening to my favourite pieces from Handel would certainly have increased my pleasure as I undertook my ante jentacular circumgyration.

But I doubt that many of the people who listen to music on their iPods today listen to Handel. We might debate whether Bach, Handel, and Beethoven are more accomplished composers of music than the Beatles, Elton John, and Kanye West, or whether the members of the London Symphony Orchestra are more accomplished performers than the contestants on the X Factor. I understand that you good scientists have a variety of methods of analysing sound, but your instruments will never tell you whether a vinyl record makes a better recording than a Compact Disc, or whether Katherine Jenkins sings better than Tom Jones. May I remind you of a remark of mine which has gained some notoriety, namely that if it produces the same amount of pleasure, push-pin is as good as poetry. Hence, if you prefer to listen to hip-hop on iPod rather than Wagner on vinyl, that simply reflects your own sensibility, and you should expect neither praise nor blame because of your taste. My advice: be content in your own enjoyment.

Sound is as objective as any physical phenomena; our reaction to it could not be more subjective.

Until we communicate again, permit me to say—‘Rock On!’

J.B.